2013-05: Three Types of People

• Doorway People:  These are people that like to stand in doorways.  Standing in a doorway means that you are controlling the space that you’re in.  It means that you are blocking access to other rooms, govern the room, and people have to go through you to get to those other spaces. If these were managers, they would be road blocks, micro-managing managers.  If they were parents, they would be dotting parents.
• Couch People:  Then we have couch people (or chair people).  These are people that like to sit somewhere, and let people come to them.  They use their voice to get attention, and are comfortable being served.  Without making too many generalizations, patriarchs fall in this category, and bosses who like to be
• Moving People: Moving people are those that always moving around, from room to room, from activity to activity.  They can’t stand still and need to move around.  These are your classic worker bees, your classic active project managers.

Now we all exhibits some traits of each kind, but notice around your house what traits you and your family demonstrate.  Also, notice what it means for your interactions.  For example, I noticed that my wife is generally between a door person and a moving person, I am between a couch and moving person.  What is particularly interesting is that I tend to be a moving person when my wife is a door person.  A classic example is when I am trying to get ready for work.  I’ll move from room to room, assembling what I need to assemble, doing the things that I need to do.  My wife will do the same, but often she will while sitting in the doorway.  As a result we run into each other quite a bit.  I end up feeling all the same feeling that one feels when they are micro-managed or hampered by a boss.  On Sunday afternoons, I tend to be a couch person and tend to use my voice to call out, at the same time, my wife tends to be a moving person then as she runs around getting projects done before the week starts.  The difference in energy between the two of us leads to some interest conflicting situations where, I think, my wife ends up feeling that I may not be contributing sufficiently (she may be right).

I was amazed to see that this carries through with friends and family.  We’ve had friends at our house and the same thing developed.  We’ve gone out with friends, and we see the same thing.  See for yourself, and let me know if you see the same.